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Sunday, May 26, 2013

Excerpt-Chapter 17. Across From the Bayou

                                                        * * *

     Johnny retired long before the cafeteria closed. The years of frugality paid off in the form of a bulging portfolio and swollen bank accounts as the markets looked upon him with much favor. Because the sun never set on Johnny’s empire, he would trade Tokyo and London before sunup and by daybreak, he was online with New York and Chicago but by afternoon he would find himself stranded in a gulf of loneliness. And it was his loneliness that accepted the invitation from a friend of an acquaintances banker to a mid afternoon business lunch at a restaurant adjacent to a gentlemen’s club. And after a fulfilling meal that ended with a signed contract, the likes of which would cause Midas envy, Johnny, out of curiosity, took a table at the gentlemen’s club where he was befriended by a seasoned dancer who, after kindling him with ease, gently blew on the glowing embers of his loneliness until the flames passion spread like wildfire through his world.
     After a few encounters that grew in frequency, her situation became an unbearable uh-happiness that only Johnny could repair. Persuading her to move in was a clever game that she would let him win, and, afterward, persuading him to marry her was a clever game that he would let her win. The little house was sold for next to nothing and replaced with a grand staircase that led to palatial rooms that sat, fashionably, in an area nestled between the eclectic and the wealth districts. Johnny found himself in the company of other misers and never felt the need to inquire on her comings and goings. Her frequent gifts of copulatory obligation, left him in a perpetual state of convalescence, and, his frequent gifts of monetary obligation, trickled down into her world and left her in a continuous state of restlessness, where, she soon found herself in the arms of a well endowed, failed artist (which explains where the money Johnny gave her went) who had a young, proportionally correct, girl on the side (which explains where the money she gave him went) who had a particular habit that kept her interesting but hard to find (which explains where the money the artists gave her went). But, soon, the money, that had worked its way to the bottom, festered there and changed form, then, became a powder that blew in the wind causing, after he had developed a conscience, the artist to be replaced with a freer spirit that ended with crashed cars and empty remorse.
     Johnny money funneled in and soothed over all the legalities as it ran quietly over all of the sharp edges, dulling, then softening them down until there was only a sense of calm and tranquility leaving only a small amount unaccounted for that sat unnoticed. Like errant rain drops suspended on a slippery surface, the unnoticed began to move and join with others until they became one. And after gaining momentum, it slipped over the edge and, once again, worked its way to the bottom where it festered and changed form, then, became a thick smoke that permeated and distorted all that it touched until it again changed form and became sirens and lights and burnt out apartments.
     Again, Johnny’s money appeared. It crept along in dark glassed anonymity, turning heads, changing stories, and sealing lips: an unseen presence that rolled on little Jaguar’s feet. But this time, it had gotten careless. The cask, from where it had flown, was spilled onto the ground where it slipped away under the soil and seeped its way to the bottom where it festered a third time and changed form. And its form was now viscus, and amber; and it percolated its way back to the surface and sat undisturbed and out of sight. Then, when self forgiveness had forgave, it drew itself into a point and pushed itself inside of her where it coursed its way through her veins. Then there were drawn curtains, and darkness, and disappearances, and withering away until finally, there was nothingness. And the regretful phone call that came in the night, took its final form as a cashiers check by way of certified mail.
     A horrific cry wailed out into the night, as she, too, had turned to gold.


Across From the Bayou: Copyright 2010 by Harold Robert Hunsaker

Saturday, May 18, 2013

The One Dollar Salvation Ticket.

The One Dollar Salvation Ticket.

     Shit, there’s a motherfucker at the entrance with a donation bucket. Now what does that clown want. I’m usually a generous type but all of my dough got burned up in the divorce and with all of the useless crap that I have bought over the years, like the deli meat slicer during my thin sliced meat phase, the slap chopper, the Ole Brooklyn Lantern and the “super absorbent” Sham-Wow cleaning cloth, etc…
     Now I’m generally the friendly type but dammit man; can’t a guy just go to Wal-Mart for cat food, steaks and low sodium heart healthy nuts without getting fleeced by some guy with a cause. My minds made up and I’m not going to cave on this one, he’ll just have to shake down someone else.
     Oh but shit, he’s got a big banner up advertising the “Children’s Miracle Network.”  I’m screwed on this one and it is going to cost me a week in hell because I’m just going to lie to the dude and tell him I’ll catch him on the way out. This guy has all of the bases covered with this so called “Children’s Miracle Network”: the holy trinity of causes. I mean, who can argue with that. Children…well who doesn’t tear up every time they see a down and out kid. And what about miracle? Surely everyone is into miracles, that is, what kind of monster wouldn’t be into miracles. Then, last but not least, network. Network, meaning, that there are more of these motherfuckers out there.
     Ok, I did it. I told the guy, straight up, I’d catch him on the way out. Now let’s see, I’ll make my way to the cat food then to the steaks then to the heart healthy nuts. And since I’ve already established myself as two-bit bold faced liar, I’ll swing by the frozen section and have a sample of those chicken taquitoes. I’ll make small talk with the lady and remark how good they are then discard the toothpick and bail out of there without any intention of buying any.
     So far so good, I managed to find everything I wanted without any hassle and was even able to score some Hillshire Farms Little Smokies along with the taquitoes. Just get through this checkout and am almost home free. The transaction is going without a hitch and just one more obstacle before I have to serve my one week in hell.
     I’ll pay the checker and wait until I receive my change before making my move. I bid farewell to the checker, grab my bags and head out. As I am working my way to the exit, I adjust my gait and blend myself into the crowd and try to get next to someone who seems as easy a mark as I am. And since I’ve already opened the floodgate of sin, I’ll use this unwitting person as a human shield of sorts.
     Alright, here we go. Were exiting the door and I maneuver my unaware accomplice in the direction of the man with the bucket. I see them make eye contact and I change my trajectory and pick up speed much like an airliner pushing out of a hail storm. Good, now keep going until you’re far enough in the parking lot before you look back. Now I look back and see my accomplice dumping a handful of change into the bucket. The man with the bucket looks happy and grateful.
     Now, safe in my car, I reluctantly look into my own eyes through the rearview mirror. I just shake my head realizing that I should have just given him a dollar. But a deal is a deal no matter what kind of deal it is. “Alright Satan, you dirty bastard, you got me for a week.”